tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25457132933328362322012-01-30T02:45:39.545-08:00Scary AzeriForeign here. Foreign there. Foreign everywhere.scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.comBlogger2831100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-32083767855408618592011-12-26T13:41:00.000-08:002011-12-26T13:41:17.843-08:00M is the best.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-91143325274288018722011-12-14T14:52:00.000-08:002011-12-14T23:34:24.412-08:00A racist asshole!Guys, something embarrassing happened to me yesterday.
I blame lack of sleeping and maternal instinct.
I was on my way from a coffee morning at my friend’s place and not far from her house was a Laura Ashley Home store. Having just received some gorgeous photos of my girls from the photo studio, I was obviously desperate to find decent frames to put them in. ‘Maybe’, I thought, ‘I will just scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-74151530608810232532011-12-03T14:03:00.000-08:002011-12-03T14:03:05.232-08:00Some "me" time today.I did something very sad today. Those very few of you who might think I am cool (I would like to think there are at least 3 of you out there somewhere in the world) will finally realize that is not the case. And such realization can be upsetting. Someone clever once told me, that one of the saddest feelings she had ever had was disappointment in people. I am, therefore, sorry for confessing thescaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-90045482435401118892011-12-01T13:10:00.000-08:002011-12-01T13:10:28.652-08:00My Favourite Street by Nailya aka Scary aka Azeri!(I was going to start by saying 'Thank you God..', because, as a normal human being, I need to thank someone, right? But, who do you thank if there is no God? So, I shall still use this, as a figure of speech....) Thank you, God, for my husband is back, and I don't have to be a crazed, stressed out bitch that I have been in the past 5 nights, all by myself, with two children. Yes! I know "scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-3445312380831703712011-11-21T14:26:00.000-08:002011-11-21T14:26:32.771-08:00A very short parenting story.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-21558368291020921962011-11-18T14:46:00.000-08:002011-12-15T05:30:29.610-08:00Let's meet in Dede Gorgud. Sorry, I meant Zabitler Parki. Bagi. Oh, screw it. Let's go to Officers' Park!I have been approached by someone to write a piece on Baku. Very exciting! I will tell you all about it in more detail once it is published.
I really enjoyed writing something about my home town. However, what proved complicated was getting the facts right. Not because I have not lived there for a while, but because nobody seemed to know what certain areas were actually called. I am talking scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-72776771015781376252011-11-09T14:20:00.000-08:002011-11-10T13:14:02.579-08:00Only in Baku.
Back in Baku, my mother has a social life ten times better than mine here. And mine is not actually that bad these days, considering how boring (very!) social life in the UK is.
She spent the whole day yesterday hanging out with two school friends who come to Baku once every three years. G. who lives in the USA and V. who is a resident of Russia, both return to their motherland together- to scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-86803760327738131122011-10-31T14:39:00.000-07:002011-10-31T14:39:45.845-07:00Why I had to unfriend Steve.OK, this might be a weird one. But it is Halloween, after all. A tad of spookiness is totally allowed and even to be expected.
So, as you know, I was told that my magazine editor died a few days ago. It was pretty shocking. But, somehow, it was even more shocking and more difficult to believe because the Steve I knew was a virtual person, so to speak. I was told he was dead and yet, I could see scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-82531969232727375152011-10-29T03:04:00.000-07:002011-10-29T03:04:46.660-07:00Steve Hollier.Steve Hollier, Editor of AZ Magazine in Baku, died a few days ago of a heart attack. Only that morning we exchanged emails discussing the next issue of the magazine, what he wanted for my column, exchanging jokes about life and the blog...and then, that very evening, someone suddenly Skyped me with the sad news. It did not even register in my brain straight away. You always think 'that is just scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-22223880156581994472011-10-26T14:01:00.000-07:002011-10-26T14:01:26.196-07:00The Azeri guide to using Facebook<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-2182195980559368702011-10-17T14:16:00.000-07:002011-10-17T14:17:16.998-07:00About a disputed territory. Not Nagorniy Karabakh, but one small balcony.You might have noticed that I have not added any sketches recently. That is not because I am so lazy these days. OK, it is somewhat because I am a bit lazy these days. But mainly, it is because someone ( i.e. Husband) switched our broadband to a different provider and did not bother to figure out how to connect the printer/scanner to the new router. You might ask what about you? Can’t you sort scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-5883027514822270042011-10-12T13:04:00.000-07:002011-12-08T13:29:56.534-08:00Introducing Feride- The Goddess of Azeri cuisine.
As promised, here is the chat with Feride, a cool girl from Baku that I met via blogging and became virtual friends with. Hope you enjoy; and don't forget to buy her book when she gets it published! I tried to keep it casual. Imagine sipping chay from samovar, like in the picture above, asking her all sorts of questions....
Q: Of course, let’s start from the beginning, as it is a good scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-10161705896134866782011-10-10T15:29:00.000-07:002011-10-10T15:32:10.104-07:00Hey, Fatty Boom Boom
As I am sitting on my sofa, barely able to breathe after the enormous dinner, I am idly toying with the thoughts of ways to start losing this post-baby weight.
Tonight I managed to consume:
Grilled aubergines with garlic which by themselves are not terribly unhealthy, if not for the salt my mother covered them with. At least 10 slices.
Five chicken burgers. Before you think whatever you might scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-5063309010318091992011-10-01T01:04:00.000-07:002011-10-01T01:04:07.169-07:00A beautiful, sophisticated, not at all corrupt but very democratic, accepting and tolerant Azeri.OK. For some reason, the name of this blog, scary azeri, really winds some azeris up.
I can only assume that they feel insulted that those two words are being used in the same sentence. Somehow, in their little defected minds, it insults not only the whole nation, but also them personally and possibly, their mothers, too when I use the words Scary and Azeri so close to each other.
So let me scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-72374011833399262082011-09-22T14:58:00.000-07:002011-09-22T14:58:41.386-07:00The Pyrex dish mystery.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-17508733333808746422011-09-14T14:31:00.000-07:002011-09-14T14:31:10.867-07:00Need help? Get an arse pair.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-39782045741219669562011-09-10T13:58:00.000-07:002011-09-11T00:20:24.209-07:00NAFTALAN
While on holiday in Wales, I accidentally stepped on something. Maybe, it was a thorn from a plant, or a tiny fragment of a shell. I thought I pulled it out but clearly, not all of it came out. So, a couple of days ago, over a week after it had happened, the toe started to hurt. Quite badly, I have to say. What do I do? I asked Husband, who had a medical background. Nothing he said. He spent scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-73372846632391148432011-09-02T14:58:00.000-07:002011-09-02T14:58:01.706-07:00Two and a half Azeris on an English train, or about various buttons.
I am back! After two weeks of vacation with no broadband and no laptop, I feel like I have time travelled and returned, back to the future.
Travelling up to North Wales is never fun, but with a tiny baby is quite painful. To be honest, we were lucky, as the baby did not cry or have one of her shit disasters. But, with having to stop and feed every three hours, we took over eight hours to get toscaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-63265745151800616852011-08-17T14:39:00.000-07:002011-08-17T14:41:21.995-07:00Loving Tim Minchin.' Thank you, Sam, for showing how my point of view has been so flawed. I assumed there was no God at all but now I see that’s cynical. It’s simply that his interests aren’t particularly broad.'
I apologize in advance if I already shared this with you. But I am totally in love with this guy.
Unfortunately, the video of Thank You God with subtitles has been removed because of some copy rights, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-4756650947010985972011-08-12T00:13:00.000-07:002011-08-12T00:13:01.537-07:00Oh.... Paul....hmm...This is what happens if you fantasise about Paul Bettany while pregnant.
scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-28622168135507825062011-08-09T14:56:00.000-07:002011-08-12T11:39:46.795-07:00Let's send them a letter.
I was watching one of my favourite cartoons last night again, Team America WorldPolice. And, besides the naked dolls porn scenes or other silly funny moments, there was one particular joke I thought was very spot on. A UN representative of some sort was visiting North Korean Kim Jong-il kindly asking him to show all the areas of the palace so he could see if there were any WMD. If you don’t scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-22605508590956423862011-08-06T13:36:00.000-07:002011-08-06T13:36:00.117-07:00The unspeakable side of being a parent.I was in the middle of talking to husband the other day when the baby let out a big cry. She was asleep in the garden in her pram, but something woke her up. I stopped talking mid-sentence and ran outside, jumping over the steps like a gazelle. Considering just how huge I am at the moment that was probably quite a shocking sight.
‘What were you saying? ‘Husband demanded, walking out in the scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-52602622502372438672011-07-29T13:50:00.000-07:002011-07-29T13:50:33.496-07:00Two very bizarre racist incidents.A friend of mine just shared a story with me, which I feel obliged to tell you.
She had an Indian older lady help her clean and cook for a while. Once, she decided to invite an Azeri girlfriend with her new Azeri husband over for lunch. She did not know, however, that the Azeri husband felt very strongly about Indian people.
‘Wow!’ he told my friend after she had introduced him to the cook, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-62106356230749972872011-07-19T14:13:00.000-07:002011-07-19T14:13:39.543-07:00Sunday lunch.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-64503128366563887182011-07-09T13:33:00.000-07:002011-07-09T13:35:03.091-07:00A friend for a reasonWe went to a fantastic party the other day-a good friend’s 50th birthday. During her speech, his wife mentioned the well-known saying: a friend for a reason, a friend for a season...and a friend for lifetime.
I have been thinking how difficult it is to create new friendships when you are at this stage of life. When you are young and single, it is a lot simpler. You meet someone you like, you scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-87596015194412520862011-06-30T12:19:00.000-07:002011-06-30T13:19:28.239-07:00Korova Milk Bar
A quickie again, I am afraid.
These days my life revolves around breastfeeding. Husband changed my nickname from Breadknife (A Cockney rhyming slang for Wife) to a Korova Milk Bar (borrowed from Clockwork Orange). This is what my life has become. To appreciate the whole extent of this metamorphose, you need to know that,during the dating stage of our relationship, he used to call me Rockchik.
scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-10127994520237907532011-06-21T15:04:00.000-07:002011-06-21T15:04:16.369-07:00A short and sweet one.A kind (Russian) friend stopped by the other day and brought me a lovely baby gift, a card and a box of Ferrero Rocher chocolates.
‘What is it with you guys and the chushka chocolates?’Husband questioned.
I laughed, as he always says that about poor Ferrero chocolates. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that they are, just like certain clothes or cars are as uncouth in the UK scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-43175229682478658802011-06-12T01:03:00.000-07:002011-06-12T01:03:37.623-07:00A disability awareness videoWhile I am sleepy, lazy and useless with my blog postings, I thought I would share this disability awareness video by United Aid for Azerbaijan (UAFA), an organization founded back in 1998 by someone I know.
A while ago, we talked about disability in a country like Azerbaijan; and what my personal awareness of it was like back home. So, as you can imagine, I was touched and impressed by this scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-79259409155118609392011-06-08T14:23:00.000-07:002011-06-08T14:23:21.699-07:00Where did my brain go?<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-45778680339533725752011-05-26T14:53:00.000-07:002011-05-26T14:53:05.825-07:00Baby is here.Well, I am a bit distracted from issues of azeriness or eurovision right now....because of this.
A full report to follow.scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-36831751151691905622011-05-20T05:06:00.000-07:002011-05-20T05:13:57.974-07:00When your troll asked: "What makes you Azeri?"Thanks to my new blog troll, Kaweh, I have been thinking about this whole what makes you Azeri? (See comments on the previous posting about the Eurovision win, if you can be bothered) issue.
Also, when Mark asked today:
“Seeing your Azeriness called into question also makes me wonder what Azeriness is. Every people has a different sense of itself, typically drawing on a mixture of heritage, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com46tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-31036651965795032262011-05-16T03:36:00.000-07:002011-05-16T03:57:02.495-07:00Finally proud to be Azeri?
Okay. I was not going to talk about this, just because there is no point. Saturday night Azerbaijan finally got something they desperately pursued for a while. The whole nation is in euphoria. But one thing just keeps rolling over and over in my head. What is the matter with me? Why am I not more excited about this?
Saturday night, Facebook news feed was full of my Azeri friends not simply scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com57tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-85234669982411674332011-05-11T12:13:00.002-07:002011-05-13T13:41:05.059-07:00'In These Hands'- Can you spot Scary Azeri?
Very excited! Okay, I know it is not huge. But it is a step forward, and also very flattering as: I did not bribe anyone for it to happen
I did not use my uncle, father or any other connected relative for it to happen (Mainly because I have not got any)
I did not even ask for it to happen!
One of my flash fiction stories, Alishah, was chosen for an anthology of 10 different stories scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-46934243248644241732011-05-06T15:24:00.000-07:002011-05-06T15:24:10.604-07:00First ever British funeral<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-21023431339092270472011-05-04T13:41:00.000-07:002011-05-04T13:41:39.783-07:004 years on and it still sucks. Big time.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-69676898093019674442011-04-28T04:51:00.000-07:002011-04-30T11:17:25.402-07:00The Royal wedding frenzy, or 'I took her up somewhere nice'
The voice of the TV presenter is almost hysterical.
What is going on? What is happening?!!! We can see some people from the helicopter...they are entering the building! Yes...they have entered the building! What does that mean???!!! We don’t know?!
You might think this might be related to something serious. For example, 500 people killed in Syria. But no, of course not! The main focus today is scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-68625257668631229332011-04-25T15:32:00.000-07:002011-04-25T15:32:07.353-07:00Living on the edge...of a field.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-55279706804622340262011-04-16T12:09:00.000-07:002011-04-16T12:09:13.464-07:00Happy Easter from a very humanistic rabbit.
I have accidentally come across an atheist blog by someone who claimed he was actually a Rabbi.
Having glanced through his blog, I found out that there is a Society for Humanistic Judaism, as well as the Association of Humanistic Rabbis. I thought it was pretty cool, and posted the news on Facebook. And, of course, someone misread it as the Association of Humanistic Rabbits.
I thought it scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-39062760950028029242011-04-12T13:08:00.000-07:002011-04-12T13:08:52.715-07:00A very pregnant sort of posting.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-64798739475950391282011-04-05T12:48:00.000-07:002011-04-05T13:01:30.376-07:00God Hates Fags (homosexuals that is, not cigarettes)
I watched “God Hates Fags”: America’s Most Hated Family In Crisis last night. I have to say it was very entertaining and educational. Until now, I always thought Christians have calmed down since the Crusade times. (Okay, it might have taken them a few more years since then but let’s not get too technical about it) I mean, so many times I hear people refer to themselves as not religious but scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-84094748385542126262011-03-30T05:24:00.000-07:002011-03-30T07:34:58.822-07:00'Size matters', said the Blue Whale to the Common ShrewI need to confess that my humour is that of a 12 year old boy. Things that I find funny are so often crude and immature. Fortunately, I don’t like fart jokes or other forms of toilet humour. However, I realize that what I consider funny has no place in a lady’s mind.
You can sometimes get a glimpse of this 12-year old boy trapped in the 35+ year old woman’s body when you hear about some of the scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-20551635780321143652011-03-26T12:51:00.000-07:002011-03-26T13:01:35.097-07:00Happy Novruz, or some very scary Azeri males.
Okay, if you are not Azeri and are not very familiar with Azeries in general, you will see this photo and think something terrible must have happened. Perhaps, someone important died? Or, maybe, it is a yet another demonstration somewhere in the Middle Eastern part of the world?
But really, this is not an image from a war zone, but from a very happy event.
The photos are by Onnik Krikorian, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-84490405152208494652011-03-22T11:51:00.000-07:002011-03-22T11:51:00.754-07:00Would you like some ashes? Sorry, wrong jar...coffee?<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-91788911142781831412011-03-18T13:02:00.000-07:002011-03-18T13:02:44.313-07:00To celebrate ( or not?) in style.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-16371052537186355462011-03-15T14:23:00.000-07:002011-03-15T14:23:02.973-07:00Yes, I know I am pregnant!
There are a lot of annoying aspects of pregnancy. Besides getting huge and heavy, tired and with constant indigestion, there are other, sometimes innocent at the first glance, sources of irritation sneaking up on you on the daily basis.
For example. I hear some pregnant women complain that the most annoying thing that happens to them during this wonderful time, is when strangers feel it is scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-82811633595388010292011-03-13T13:20:00.000-07:002011-03-13T13:20:29.442-07:00A good experience, for a change.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-79313176956376837612011-03-10T03:16:00.000-08:002011-03-10T03:16:02.295-08:00Russian Chastushki in English?Someone sent me these the other day, and I thought (partially because I am hopelessly bored at work, and partially because it would be just wrong not to) that I should share them with you. If you think there must be some powerful hidden message between the lines, then you are of course, mistaken.
Russian Chastushki, just like Russian jokes, are not always easy to translate or understand. Just scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-23094893876608738032011-03-08T00:33:00.000-08:002011-03-08T00:33:47.963-08:00Happy International Women's Day!To all my cool, sexy, sophisticated, beautiful and very intelligent female readers!
Happy International Women's Day!
Oh, and if you, for some bizarre reason, do not find my incredibly sexy Azeri male appealing enough, here is a slightly different type for you...Daniel Craig dressed as a woman to highlight the inequality of women around the world.
Hmm....Is it wrong that I still find him scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-8121352860060929072011-03-06T12:36:00.000-08:002011-03-06T12:36:26.423-08:00C'est la vie, or shit happens.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-37286130589129354612011-03-01T11:05:00.000-08:002011-03-01T11:05:49.611-08:00Glamorization<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-17328432469335929352011-02-24T13:49:00.000-08:002011-02-24T13:49:37.342-08:00Diaspora? What Diaspora?<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-29469707553868444182011-02-21T13:56:00.000-08:002011-02-21T13:56:36.733-08:00A typical British play date. Azeri style.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-83701670464898702622011-02-16T09:41:00.000-08:002011-02-16T10:41:44.932-08:00The Sinner and The Saint.
Well, well, well... It is a very exciting time right now for those Azeris who think Eurovision is cool. Finally, despite the usual suspicious vote counting and some serious complaints sent to the Eurovision panel, the finalists for the next cheesy show have been chosen.
What can I say? It is an interesting choice. I would suggest a very smart one. Because, we are now covering all angles and scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-35228090584214862032011-02-10T06:32:00.000-08:002011-02-10T06:32:41.485-08:00Your bones on my bones.Honestly, why cant people write proper song lyrics anymore? What is the matter with:
a) artists and song writers;
b) fans who let them get away with moronic words, singing along and clapping like a bunch of idiots?
I have noticed recently that there are a few very bizarre songs out there, which you might not be familiar with, but as an XFM radio station listener I get to enjoy on regular basisscaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-69808152824462420382011-02-05T14:30:00.000-08:002011-02-05T14:30:17.294-08:00Ligaments and anginas.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-38757862656439087432011-02-01T13:08:00.000-08:002011-02-01T13:27:06.078-08:00Nothing compares to you.A friend of mine made me very happy this morning. She reminded me of the mutual friend of ours ( let’s call her Ms.K.) whom I never liked; for such an awfully long and painful time, that at some point I just sat down and asked myself-why, oh why???!!! would I be going through this absolute torture of soul and mind? So I made an effort and cut her out of my life. (I told you briefly about her herescaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-65128864756770285442011-01-30T11:50:00.000-08:002011-01-30T11:50:07.517-08:00Love is.....an unexpected pedicure<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-64580334383972694292011-01-19T10:57:00.000-08:002011-01-21T13:47:12.904-08:00Golden Teeth, or why she wasn't smiling.Automated MNU Instructional Voice: [in MNU Humvee] When dealing with aliens, try to be polite, but firm. And always remember that a smile is cheaper than a bullet.
(District 9)
I must, indeed, be hormonal. Not only because I am having a fight with HR about one day of leave, which I'd pre-booked before Christmas but then fell ill (and which they would not give me back) but because something scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-60322716457303964712011-01-16T12:32:00.000-08:002011-01-16T12:32:43.869-08:00Mating slugs, sunflower seeds and other modern art<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-34328949793848953322011-01-13T10:52:00.000-08:002011-01-13T11:52:48.475-08:00Sheep shagging and other strange jokes. I was actually going to do a sketch to go with this posting but then thought better of it.
The other night, my friend and I were discussing quite a sick Russian joke someone sent us by email.
It was one of those jokes we, ex-Soviets, get all the time. Most of them are simply untranslatable into English. Even when we get the meaning across, most of the westerners just give us a blank look back, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-52702093928275356952011-01-09T13:03:00.000-08:002011-01-09T13:03:14.893-08:00A hormonal rant, or Scary Mummy business, Part II<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-31723208238267441592011-01-05T13:59:00.000-08:002011-01-05T14:04:43.070-08:00About cold sores, worms and head lice.Oh no.
I have absolutely nothing to write about. It is a disaster. Because, that means that one of the following is the case:
That my brain is completely eaten by hormones and I just lost any ability to think creatively; or simply to think, full stop.
I have nothing going on in my life, not even anything I could whinge or bitch about.
I am too lazy, too fat and too tired; and it will only getscaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-4560421465422833812010-12-31T10:27:00.000-08:002010-12-31T10:27:45.405-08:00Happy New year! S Novim Godom!<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-17515217098375702332010-12-21T02:26:00.000-08:002010-12-21T02:26:20.661-08:00Why not accessorize this winter?Just had to share this with you.
A very nice colleague brought them into work today and proudly placed them on her desk. Shocking behaviour, if you ask me. I told her things like that should be kept in one’s secret drawer, not displayed on one’s desk at work!
The question is…what do you think these hmm things are?
I had so many jokes about this, that I did not even know where to start.
scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-53186744091021472902010-12-18T15:45:00.000-08:002010-12-18T15:46:31.617-08:00A Girl’s best friend.We are snowed in. Nowhere to go, nothing to do...but cook. I have spent the whole day today making some Georgian? (Or is it Azeri? Might be Russian) salads, and marinated a humongous chicken for my mother’s signature plov.
In theory, two couples are coming for lunch with their kids tomorrow. But, looking outside, I have some serious doubts.
You see, as soon as we see any snow in the UK, we scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-63822852438256812612010-12-16T00:55:00.000-08:002010-12-16T00:55:29.388-08:00Silly doodles in work notebooksI thought I was entering the infamous glowing stage of pregnancy this morning as I applied make-up and got dressed for the office Christmas lunch later today. But that only lasted until I had to brush my teeth, which caused me to gag and throw up a little.
I wanted to show you these unexplainable sketches of mine to see if any of you have any idea why I would draw endless legs, shoes and scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-29117725446751942952010-12-10T10:59:00.000-08:002010-12-11T08:44:25.299-08:00Is it cheaper to be a Jew?As an atheist from a Muslim country, I love celebrating Christmas in the UK. I love the athmosphere and the lights, the presents and the smelly candles in our homes. Everything looks and feels pretty and cozy. To me, it is a cultural, family holiday. But also, a very expensive one.
I have been thinking, looking at my bank balance online this morning, just how costly Christmas is. I am not even scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-19980453261046095642010-12-06T14:53:00.000-08:002010-12-06T14:53:48.662-08:00Scary the matchmaker<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-92096957667008368342010-11-29T13:07:00.000-08:002010-11-29T13:07:32.227-08:00Some grown-up time.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-86900695523430433902010-11-24T02:22:00.000-08:002010-11-24T02:22:01.493-08:00"Impossible" on RammenasA new flash fiction story is now up on Rammenas. A short luuuuv story. With a twist. Check it out.scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-44791347252309097062010-11-22T13:35:00.000-08:002010-11-22T13:35:19.219-08:00A "Borderline Atheist" Muslim.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-15592388366400002622010-11-20T13:29:00.000-08:002010-11-20T13:29:54.652-08:00Borsch and some white sponges<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-46085730751335246392010-11-15T13:45:00.000-08:002010-11-15T13:45:32.007-08:00On equality and diversity<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-21002272033170601972010-11-13T13:18:00.000-08:002010-11-13T13:18:42.088-08:00Some news to share.<!--[if gte mso 9]> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-28348642971596979792010-11-08T02:55:00.000-08:002010-11-08T02:55:23.305-08:00The Devil's HelperOK, I know this topic will not get anywhere near the number of comments or excitement the Azeri Thriller routine managed to receive; yet I just wanted to mention that a new flash story is up on Rammenas. Let me know what you think. Mother thought it was too predictable. I think it is great that she is becoming less biased.scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-49161079093418584832010-11-02T14:11:00.000-07:002010-11-02T14:11:39.833-07:00The Azeri Fleshmob obsession (image borrowed from 1news.az)
Hey, alright now
Alright now fellows, Yeah!
Now what's cooler than bein' cool? Ice Cold!
I can't hear ya'
I say what's cooler than bein' cool? Ice Cold!OutKast, Hey ya!
I really don’t want to be offensive with this posting. Because, as some of you are too aware, Azeris are super-sensitive when it comes to any scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com61tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-13016956690861544802010-10-30T15:00:00.000-07:002010-10-30T15:00:09.835-07:00How can I ever make that decision?<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-44398326422096051242010-10-26T13:56:00.000-07:002010-10-26T13:56:32.947-07:00To immigrate or not, that is the question.
A guy I know in Baku is immigrating to Canada. ( everybody seems to be immigrating to Canada these days, have you noticed?) It is strange that my first reaction was not an excitement for him, but almost a shock. Why are you doing this? I wanted to ask.
Strange that it should surprise me. After all, I spent most of my conscious life wanting to leave Azerbaijan. Why would I question the motivesscaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-67344276174207286762010-10-24T14:40:00.000-07:002010-10-24T14:40:21.692-07:00Natural born leader<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-81598482766326800202010-10-17T14:27:00.000-07:002010-10-17T14:27:13.134-07:00Sunday pizza and some Russian mushrooms<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-57566756845928264382010-10-12T11:18:00.000-07:002010-10-12T11:18:14.490-07:00Some thoughts inspired by a hairbrush. Part II.<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-87317803899455811792010-10-08T03:21:00.000-07:002010-10-08T03:25:02.483-07:00Some thoughts inspired by a hairbrush.Part 1.
I was in my friend’s bathroom one day washing hands when I noticed a very nice looking hairbrush. It was so nice that I got tempted to brush my hair with it, to see if it was as soft and lovely as it promised to be. I glanced around, the door was closed and nobody could see me.
'Go on!' a voice inside my head said, 'Try it. She will never know!'
But I stopped. Some instinct told me scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-28303599896522247892010-10-03T06:04:00.000-07:002010-10-03T06:04:35.200-07:00From lemon squeezer to Peter Rabbit.
Judge not, that ye be not judged. Last night i had the most bizarre dream. I am actually embarrassed to tell you any details. All I can say is I was NOT participating in any activities. It was like watching a very weird movie. In short, the events took place in what I can only describe as an erotic circus. I wonder if those even exist. Because, if not, we could be talking huge business scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-1247332150486545392010-10-01T10:01:00.000-07:002010-10-01T10:01:01.693-07:00(Almost) back form the deadA very short posting. This is me, half-dead, on the sofa for the past few days with the most horrendous, splitting, killing bastard of a headache imaginable. Poor me. You should all send me chocolates and money. And don't leave me. I will be back in my usual chatty mood soon. Promise. What does not kill us makes us stronger.scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-43056132363447632992010-09-28T14:15:00.000-07:002010-09-28T14:15:14.799-07:00Dude, where is my car?<!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-GB X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-6854752991037588232010-09-26T13:17:00.000-07:002010-09-27T00:17:57.254-07:00Some friendship thoughts inspired by high temperatureA friend in need's a friend indeed,
A friend with weed is better...
(Placebo, Pure Morning)
It feels like it has been an awfully long time. I simply had nothing in my head, to be honest. Been busy feeling sorry for myself. Of course, as soon as the school started, my child brought back a nasty cold. I thought I managed to avoid catching it, but last night, without any warning, had a high fever scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-65027277439814568752010-09-21T14:11:00.000-07:002010-09-21T14:21:45.212-07:00The Thing.
Guys….
Some thing is nesting somewhere inside my bedroom wall.
At first, I thought the noise was probably just coming from upstairs, where my mother was staying at the time. You see, we have an attic conversion, which means nothing can nest in the roof’s eaves or wherever nesting usually occurs. But then again, what would I know about the usual nesting places?
My worst experience back home scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-86362531887571959082010-09-19T16:22:00.000-07:002010-09-19T16:22:05.740-07:00Shall we go back to my....Lada?
We are watching Clerks tonight. Exciting! I have watched Clerks II possibly 157 times but never saw Clerks. You have got to watch Clerks II- if only for the expression “Interspecies Erotica”.
So here we are again. The summer was officially over (not that we had any) this morning when we had to switch on the central heating.
My mother went back home after a....let’s just say reasonably scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-72029891387204245072010-09-17T10:57:00.000-07:002010-09-17T10:58:12.706-07:00Nope to The Pope!How is this possible?
Today, on my day off, I was mucking about at home with the telly on in the background, like a proper Azeri. We like having our tellies on, even if we are not watching them.
And of course, the Pope is here. And of course, his arrival took over the news. It is like this country has nothing better to talk about. Great, they thought, we have some old man to fill the airtime!scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-88254215036791509312010-09-14T14:06:00.000-07:002010-09-14T14:06:48.855-07:00Hello from Zemfira!
A little while ago I received a comment on this blog from an Italian fellow asking how to tell if the emails he was getting from an Azeri girl were a scam.
I already told you before about a supposedly Azeri girl who emailed a friend of mine.
Well, as some of you correctly pointed out, the village Zemfira the girlfriend claimed to be living in is actually currently occupied by Armenia.
So, scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-91099400909117352852010-09-12T13:35:00.000-07:002010-09-13T05:41:22.025-07:00A hand in the darkSo, back to the original weird American.
As I said, it is not really about how weird or not he is as a person. Some people act weird when placed in a weird situation. And the situation was, indeed, odd.
Imagine two young, reasonably attractive (so I say so myself) single girls. One Azeri and one American. On their way to Moscow, for a little city break.
Now, imagine my shock when my friend scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-21990554566952938472010-09-08T14:54:00.000-07:002010-09-09T00:01:11.912-07:00One weird American. Oh, yes. Part IActually, this is where I paused for a second, and realized, that before I tell you a funny story about one weird American guy I met, I have to tell you this one. Because I remembered that the guy I was originally going to tell you about was not the only weird American I have met. He was not really weird either. It is more like the situation which was weird. But I will let you be the judges of scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-4591176900895355142010-09-06T15:23:00.000-07:002010-09-07T00:26:21.618-07:00ZemlyakiYears ago, my father was on his way back to Baku from a small town in Russia, where he had spent a year working on a contract. He had made some money and was bringing it back home. In Moscow, where he had a few hours to kill between the flights, he met a zemlyak. A compatriot. My father was very excited to spend a few hours with someone from Baku. What a great coincidence, right?
When he woke scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-23732160551560531262010-09-05T14:07:00.000-07:002010-09-05T14:08:33.709-07:00Introducing the Arrogant Atheist T-shirtsApologies to those of you who might not appreciate this...But I had to share. Because I thought these were great. Personally, can't decide between this one...
and this one.....
I reckon I should get both and wear them around the village. The first one is going to get me a lot of local friends.
Husband wants a BBQ apron.
Oh, and if anyone wants to get them, here is the link!
Back with a scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-67668837584272808142010-09-02T13:22:00.000-07:002010-09-02T13:22:33.727-07:00A Foot Massage ParlourVincent: Have you ever given a foot massage?
Jules: [scoffs] Don't be tellin' me about foot massages. I'm the foot fuckin' master.
Vincent: Given a lot of 'em?
Jules: Shit yeah. I got my technique down and everything, I don't be ticklin' or nothin'.
Vincent: Would you give a guy a foot massage?
[Jules gives Vincent a long look, realizing he's been set up]
Jules: Fuck you.
Vincent: You givescaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-12179380109960807732010-08-30T14:57:00.000-07:002010-08-30T14:57:20.896-07:00The benefits of being a CHMO.Well, it has been a bank holiday here, in the sunny (inverted commas) Britain this weekend.
Which means we get a three-day weekend instead of the usual two-day one. You might think that is a good thing. But no, not really. It just means we have an extra day to fill in with fun activities. And this is where it is difficult not to be a CHMO. Because, most of my friends right now are either away scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-47439261717918438072010-08-26T15:23:00.000-07:002010-08-26T15:23:33.427-07:00Weapon of choice.
I have been thinking about Facebook recently, as you do. Not because they were messing about closing and opening scary azeri fan page like a bunch of retards. Oh, I know I am not supposed to use this word. But I love it. It is such a juicy, tasty word! Please, allow me to use it! I promise, I won’t do it often. Husband wanted to use it the other day (on me, of course!) and said: ‘That word, you scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-5792478756298972502010-08-25T13:40:00.000-07:002010-08-25T13:43:08.853-07:00I am f****ing Matt DamonGuys....
This is not a proper posting. This is one of those in-between postings posting, you know.
As it happens with me, some nights I just have (a bit!) too much wine and feel happy for no real reason, whatsoever. I had a hard day today, you know? Full of silly tasks, like working from home and going to Costco...so I needed this glass of red vino tonight. Or two.
Anyway. Whenever that scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-71234789463632740232010-08-23T14:32:00.000-07:002010-09-01T02:59:23.850-07:00'What happens to ships in winter?'Mother’s English is entirely self-taught. Considering that, it is pretty amazing. However, whenever she leaves me a comment on the blog, I always catch her out.
‘How do you know it is me?’ She laughs, and I tell her that I can always tell it is her, from the way she structures her sentences. That, and the favouritism.
‘Stop it now!’ my friend said to her daughter, ‘Or you get in a whole lot ofscaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2545713293332836232.post-86479322047669876602010-08-19T13:04:00.000-07:002010-09-14T12:58:22.786-07:00There's a starman sitting in the sky...There's a starman waiting in the sky
Hed like to come and meet us
But he thinks he'd blow our minds
There's a starman waiting in the sky
He told us not to blow it
Cause he knows it's all worthwhile
He told me: Let the children lose it
Let the children use it
Let all the children boogie
David Bowie, Starman
The other night, at a family dinner table in North Wales, we got into a heated scaryazerihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08209595384194222929noreply@blogger.com25